debt

How to Sell Stuff Online Fast

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A person taking a picture of clothes to sell online

Whether you’re trying to get out of debt or boost your investment income for retirement, one of the best ways to achieve these goals is to resell items you no longer need.  Thanks to the Internet, it’s even easier to sell things online.  You’ll need to research which platforms would be the best and that would give you the most decent profits.  Make sure your items are in good or excellent condition, and you should research the average prices of what you’re selling so that you’re not overcharging but still charging enough to earn a profit.  Here are some cool ways to sell items online fast and achieve your financial goals.

eBay

This is one of the best ways to sell things online, and here are a few tips on getting sales quicker on this platform.  Start by including as many details as possible on the items you’re selling.  By doing this, the buyer won’t have as many questions, which speeds up the ability to earn profits faster.  Use the Best Offer feature on your listings since this helps buyers who want to negotiate.  Offer multiple payment options and avoid auction-style listings. Take high-quality pictures of your items.

Consider Which Items Sell the Best

Don’t waste time online selling items that people will not want.  It is better to research which items are the most popular among certain demographics and budget levels.  This helps you sell items faster online.  Brand-name clothing is always popular with online shoppers, and if you have outfits from the most popular designers, you’re likely to sell faster.  Other items that do well for online sellers include video games, electronic gadgets, kids’ clothing, furniture, toys, and sports equipment.

Use the Decluttr App

If you have a lot of gadgets that are in good condition, sell them through the Decluttr app.  All you have to do is look up the devices you want to sell then enter the barcodes in the app.  Then the app lets you know the overall value of your items and how much they’ll offer for your items.  After you accept the offer, they’ll send you a shipping label and you can pack up your items for shipping to them.

Try Facebook Marketplace

This is a neat way to sell items fast online.  Start by taking pictures of a certain type of item and then post the pictures and information to Facebook groups that sell specific types of items such as used books or used kids’ clothing.  It would be quicker to sell if you can do it locally and have the person meet you in a public place to pick up the items.  However, you have the option of shipping your items for a 5% selling fee.  

Customer Service Should Be on Point

Be sure to answer potential customers’ questions promptly as this helps you sell items faster.  Be concise with the information in your listings and the pictures should be clear enough for everyone to see.  Make sure the items are priced fairly and exhibit a professional attitude at all times. Offer products that promote sustainable lifestyle.

These strategies will be helpful in selling your items faster online.

How to Get Business Loans with Bad Credit

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If you’re a small business owner, having bad credit can feel like a prison.

You need financing to pump much-needed cash into your business for growth and expansion…

…but not having good enough credit to obtain financing from a bank or traditional lender means you’re stuck in place.

Fortunately, alternative lending has exploded over the past decade and now offers small business owners with bad credit several great options for obtaining the funds their business needs, whether to pick themselves back up after a slow season or to expand into new horizons.

Business loans with bad credit: Your options

So, what are your options?

It might be a little hard to believe that there really are options available to small business owners with bad credit, but it’s true.

In fact, there are several:

  • Unsecured business loans: An unsecured business loan is typically based on cash flow, gross annual sales, and your business’ credit score (typically scores ranging 540+), up to as much as $2,000,000.00 and does not require collateral.
  • Business line of credit: A revolving credit balance you can use as the need arises (similar to a credit card).
  • Split funding: Also known as a merchant cash advance, split funding deducts a percentage of your credit card sales each business day to repay the loan, making them perfect for businesses whose cash flow fluctuates due to heavy and light seasons (such as Christmas).
  • Term loans: A quick chunk of cash typically used for a specific purpose such as to buy materials, new equipment, or hire new personnel before a busy season.

Now that you know some of your options, let’s take a look at everything you’ll need to get a small business loan even with bad credit.

What do lenders look for?

The first and perhaps most important thing to know is what lenders are looking for when they receive an application.

If you know what they’re looking for in advance, you can position yourself to be much more likely to be approved for a business loan even if you have bad credit.

Here are a few of the most important things that lenders are looking for:

1. Debt is low and under control

First, lenders want to see that your debt is not only low but under control. Are you on time or do you have late payments? Also, is there collateral on any loans involved? These are all important factors to look out for when preparing to apply for a business loan with bad credit.

2. Revenue is high and growing

Revenue helps lenders forecast your ability to pay back a loan. In a nutshell, it’s best if your revenue is not only high but also on an upward trajectory. If you’re currently growing, you’ll be in good shape to lenders (on paper, at least).

In addition, revenue helps decide what size of loan you’re approved for, so it has more than one purpose.

3. Cash flow is abundant and well managed

Cash flow is another very important metric because businesses want to see not only how you manage your money, whether you overspend and pay late or never stretch beyond your limits and pay on time, but also how much cash savings you have in case something goes wrong.

The reality is, no one ones what’s going to happen tomorrow. For that reason, lenders want to see that you have a nest egg you can use to continue paying off your loan in case business suddenly takes a dip.

A note on credit

While great credit isn’t necessary, it still helps to do everything you can make your credit look as good as it can.

If you have any tax liens, foreclosures, or bankruptcies on your credit, do whatever you can to take care of them and get them off your personal credit. This will go a long way in getting approved for a loan.

Clearly, not every business can fulfill each of the above points we just mentioned perfectly. In fact, very few can.

Simply use the above information as a marker for placing yourself in a position to have the highest chance of being accepted for a loan.

What are the minimum requirements to qualify for a small business loan with bad credit?

In addition to there being certain things that lenders look for when they review an application, there are also typically minimum requirements to even be considered for a loan in the first place.

They tend to be pretty easy qualifications to meet, however, they’re nonetheless required before your application can even be accepted.

Each type of financing is different, but here are what the basic requirements tend to be for many bad credit business loans:

  • Be in business for at least X months or years (typically, somewhere between 6 months to 2 years)
  • Have X amount of monthly gross revenue (typically $10,000 or more)
  • Must be in good standing (In other words, can’t currently be defaulted on a loan with another lender, etc.)

On top of those basic qualifications, you’ll also need a few documents to verify and proof certain information.

What documents do I need?

Every lender and loan product is different. However, the documents needed to apply for each tend to be pretty similar. And, regardless, it’s a good idea to have this stuff in order anyway.

Here are some of the documents that may be required by lenders for you to complete your application and get approved:

  • Business licenses
  • Proof of ownership
  • Property lease agreement
  • Personal and business tax returns
  • Voided check
  • Drivers license
  • Bank statements
  • Profit & loss statement
  • Debt schedule

Get a small business loan even with bad credit

Obtaining a small business loan with bad credit has never been easier.

And it’s not just possible, you have several great options to choose from in unsecured business loans, business lines of credit, term loans, and merchant cash advances (AKA split funding).

You don’t want bad credit to hold you back from getting the funds your business needs to grow. Now, it doesn’t have to.

How Much Money Can You Safely Borrow?

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Almost everyone carries at least some form of debt. In the first quarter of 2017, consumer debt in America hit an all-time high of $12.73 trillion. Household debt continues to grow every year, alongside federal and corporate debt. In other words, the country is swimming in borrowed capital.

This isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Debt of any kind can actually be beneficial if it’s used responsibly. Borrowed money can help save you time and effort in several situations, from buying a house, getting educated, or starting a new business. A quick loan from Cash Stop can help you meet your monthly expenses, buy that new car, or purchase a new piece of tech. Debt can certainly be useful in moderation.

By borrowing a sustainable amount, you can fund your dreams and complete important projects without messing up your credit score or your personal finances. Here’s how you can figure out how much money you can borrow safely:

Total Net worth

In order to borrow safely, it’s important to estimate your ability to pay back the loan. A crucial factor is your net worth. Your personal net worth is the estimated value of all your assets, minus the estimated value of everything you owe. In other words, it’s the net value of everything you possess.

When total debt is measured as a ratio against your net worth, it provides a clearer structure to your personal finances. As a rule of thumb, the lower the debt-to-net worth ratio, the more sustainable the debt.

While a debt-to-net worth ratio of less than 1x is ideal, any ratio below 2.5x would be considered relatively safe.

Interest Coverage

Another, and more precise, way to calculate debt sustainability is the debt-to-income (DTI) ratio. By measuring gross monthly income against your net debt expenses you can accurately estimate your ability to service the debt load.

Experts disagree on the ideal ratio of debt expenses to income. However, a good place to start is the recommended ratio for qualified mortgages.

Under the Dodd-Frank Wall Street Reform and Consumer Protection Act, lenders, banks, and financial institutions can offer borrowers special protections and terms if the debt expenses or monthly interest payments are less than 43% of monthly gross income. This means a debt expense-to-income ratio of less than 0.43 would be considered safe. For home loans and mortgages, financial planners recommend keeping this ratio below 0.30.

In short, spending less than one-third of your pre-tax income every month on all your interest payments is financially sustainable.

Final Thoughts

The wealthier you are the more you can borrow. Your total wealth and gross income are important factors to consider when estimating how much money you can borrow. Banks and lenders have specific ratios in mind when they offer to extend a loan. Sticking to these ratios makes it more likely that your debt will help you grow, rather than put you in a detrimental, stressful position.

Six Ways Student Debt can Swallow up Your Budget

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Chances are you won’t find a single postgraduate in the nation who doesn’t audibly groan and wince like they stepped on a Lego at the mention of “student debt”. The truth of the matter is that student debt actually has even more dire implications than people are aware of. Aside from simply needing to struggle with paying back their personal debt balance, student loan debt impacts your budget in ways that are far more expansive than you may know.

Less opportunity for independent proprietorship

Historically, people have been able to survive periods of economic destitution by starting small businesses to supplement their income. However, due to the costs for college skyrocketing in such a short period of time, the windows of opportunity for you to overcome a saturated job market by opening a small business are shrinking. Student debt isn’t just something that you need to pay back, but also an anchor on the amount of money that you can safely invest into improving your overall standard of living in general. The higher your debt grows, the less freedom you have to use innovative and independent methods for fighting it.

Inability to set aside money for a buying home

In the face of soaring student debt, you won’t have nearly as much of an ability to think about becoming a homeowner. Without being able to set aside as much money as you would if you were debt free, the costs of home ownership will likely be far higher than what’s reasonable. Without being able to escape loan debt, chances are that most postgraduates will have to resign to renting for the rest of their lives.

A much lower chance of getting any other kind of loan

Even if you sweep your student loan debt under the rug and refuse to think about it, student loan delinquency is never invisible. Your inability to pay back a loan will be recorded and have a direct effect on your credit score, which will essentially blacklist you from all credit unions that bring it up. Due to the difficulty of getting any loans, student debt can end up forcing you to pay for just about everything in cash.

Your retirement will be hindered

Obviously, when you’re so focused on keeping your head above water with your student loans, there are other responsibilities and needs that just go untouched. It’s not news that it’s becoming more and more difficult every year for Americans to make retirement their priority, but what is new is the amount of debt that young adults are having to take on to help pay for a degree.

If there’s one piece of advice that young adults need to take is that if your employer has a 401K plan, and they have a matching program, you should probably take advantage of it. Retirement advisors agree that the optimal time for Americans to start saving is 24 or 25. Even if it’s only $50 a month. Save.

Budgeting for student debt

Despite the reality of how daunting student debt can be, it isn’t impossible to successfully fight against it with the right budgeting techniques. The first step of the process to to simply come up with a budget in the first place, which is many people may initially find too intimidating to even consider. Maintaining a student checking account can help you monitor spending habits and determine how much you can afford to spend each month on your loan.

Mark off a weekend that you can sit down and identify all of the specific ways that student debt could potentially interfere with your personal ambitions; there is generally a six-month grace period allowed after graduation. Even if six months have already passed, you can still benefit from working the budget out as soon as possible.

Determine a monthly payment amount, and make a commitment that you can reasonably maintain. Even if you can only pay back a small amount at a time, anything is better than nothing at all. Calculate any payments on private student loans that you may have as well, and be sure to consider talking to any private lenders who may be able to guide you in the right direction.

After you know how much you’re going to be spending on loan repayment on a daily basis, take a moment to see how you budget can be reconfigured to accommodate it.

A Financial Frame of Mind: Drawing the Line Between Frugal and Obsessively Cheap

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Michael Jackson was known for the lavish shopping sprees that he went on for his own amusement. According to unauthorized biographies by Randy J. Tarraborelli and others, though, Jackson could be grasping when it came to compensating the music producers, attorneys, managers, security agents and other professionals whose skills he depended on.

Michael Jackson’s life carries an important moral lesson on the line between frugality and cheapness, generosity and flash.  If your particular brand of financial philosophy hurts anyone — you or others in any way, you’re probably doing something wrong.

What are some of the other tests to apply to yourself?

What is your bottom line — price or value? It’s an important test to apply. If you find yourself picking a cheap, low-capacity computer solely for the price savings to be had and don’t feel like thinking about how you lose out on productivity, you could be crossing the line from frugality to cheapness.

Do you want to save to spend, or just save to save? Those who are frugal love to spend, but only on the things that they personally consider important. They may not shop for clothes or gadgets, but may spend on a college course or a great vacation. The frugal person does want to spend, but wants to do it on their own terms. A person who is cheap saves for no good reason.

Is there any elective spending that makes you happy? If you tend to lean towards cheapness, there is probably no kind of spending that does. Every elective expense leaves you with a feeling of guilt and dread. If you have a healthy attitude to money, though, there are likely to be plenty of things that you can think of, that you would spend on without feeling bad.

Are your choices short-sighted ones? Would you buy a cheaper home for the saving right now, even if it means a poor long-term investment? The inability to loosen up for a better investment is a hallmark of obsessive thrift. When it comes to investments, it’s important to take the long view.

Is your thrift more about smartness or brute force? People who tend towards frugality spend less money by being smart about their shopping. They might always buy quality brands, but choose the previous year’s model to save money. They might spend some time couponing, and always be careful never to pay credit card interest. When you’re cheap, you usually go all out, and simply shut down your spending. Your purchases will tend towards unreliable, low-cost brands, or not buying anything, at all.

Do you like spending to make others happy? Frugal people usually do. They find their careworn minds loosening up when it comes to an opportunity to spend a little money to make someone happy. If you find that you’re unable to happily spend for any reason, there’s a problem.

Finding the will to change

Whether you hold on to your money or blow everything to impress others, you basically value money itself, rather than the power to create happiness that it represents. While being tight-fisted can make you happy in a narrow sense, it can have devastating consequences on your life and the lives of those who depend on you. It’s important to step back, take a look at what your relationship with money does, and gradually develop the will to change. If you’re willing to give yourself enough time, and to begin a careful move towards moderation, you’ll find that it leaves everyone far happier.

Start by spending on others

Buy the best gifts for your loved ones on birthdays and on holidays, going as far as you can afford. Look for good charities to give to, and don’t claim a tax break. Tip well, and be generous when you pay people who work for you.

Certainly, you shouldn’t spend any more than you can actually afford. It’s important when you begin to loosen up, that you are aware of exactly where you’re headed financially. If you aren’t used to being free with your money, it could end in overreach.

Make solid, logically defensible choices

One of the best ways to make the change is to carefully begin paying for greater quality in every purchase. Whether it’s a car where you get greater protection or better quality foods that are more nutritious, upgrades where you can easily calculate the value that you’re getting for your money are an excellent way to begin.

Look for the irrationality

A careful look at your motivations for not wanting to spend money is usually the ultimate way to change. It can take a painful look at yourself to be successful. In the end, though, it’s worth it.

Sheldon Roberson came across frugal living a few years ago, and was instantly hooked as she realized how it could assist her as an investor. She encourages others to learn about these lesser-known ideas and writes on the topic for a small number of blogs.

Who Else Wants To Retire Early and be Free?

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retiring early and looking to the future

At times, it can seem like staying in the workforce grind isn’t worth it any longer. As one gets older it’s natural to want to take things easier and enjoy freedoms that have been earned from a lifetime of work. The standard age of retirement in the United States is roughly 67 years of age. 

However, you can retire a full five years earlier at age 62. There are pros and cons to this decision, and it should not be made lightly. However, if you’re ready to get some of your freedom back, here are the things you need to know and consider about retiring early.

Understand Your Money Situation

Your thirst for freedom is valid. You’ve worked hard in your life and want to reap the rewards. However, you need to understand that choosing to retire early can drastically affect what your financial situation looks like for the rest of your life. Take, for example, your social security check.

If you were to retire at 67 you could receive the full amount of possible money from your Social Security. However, retiring as soon as you can will bring in less money. This may not necessarily be a deterrent for you based on your needs. It is simply something to be mindful of.

If YOu Retire Early, What Does Your Budget Look Like?

One of the most important steps you need to take if you intend to retire early is to assess your yearly spending habits. How much did you spend on utilities? Do you rent or own your home? Add your yearly housing costs to the list. Compare that with the amount of money you are estimated to receive and you will start to form an idea of what your financial situation may look like.

This may seem like a daunting task to take on. This is where speaking to a financial adviser could really be a benefit for you as they would be able to help you put together a realistic idea of what you would have to spend to get through the year while relying on your Social Security check.

Look at Remaining Debts

It  needs to be said that if you are considering early retirement, you should also be considering how you plan to resolve any outstanding debts that you may have. Making new arrangement with your debtors may be something that you have to do in order to achieve your retirement goals.

Consider Investments

You may still want (and need) to make money after you’re retired. It may behoove you to place investments that can earn you money back. Once again, this is a matter in which speaking with a financial adviser can give you the information and insight you need in order to decide if making such investments are the best plan for you and your retirement.

What Will You Do With Your Time?

It is easy to imagine a life of retirement as simply kicking back in a lawn chair with a cold lemonade and bidding goodbye to your worries. But it may not take long to realize that you may find that version of retirement to be a bit boring after awhile. 

You should make up a list of things that you would like to do with your retirement. Having a game plan like that can not only give you a sense of purpose during your retirement, it can actually save you money in the long term because you will not waste time, energy, and money trying to figure out what you want to do on a day to basis.

Retirement Doesn’t Necessarily Mean Retiring

When talking about retirement it is easy enough to think of retirement as the end of working in one’s life. However, whether you feel you are not getting enough money or because you are likely to become restless, you should know that collecting your retirement does not mean you have to quit working altogether. 

You can choose to take up a side hustle: Turn a well-loved hobby into a business opportunity or even take up food delivery. There are numerous things that you can do to continue to bring in money, even after you have technically retired. Best of all, none of them lock you into a contract and they allow you to work at the pace that you desire. You can stay as busy as you would like.

The Plan is Worth It

It may seem headache-inducing to have to plan out how you want to live post-retirement. However, having no strategy at all could turn the retirement itself into a big headache if you are not careful. Being smart with your financial and life plans will help you get the most out of retirement to ensure that it is as enjoyable as possible.

Spartan Blues

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Earlier this year, I mentioned that I’ll be running the spartan death race.  Despite the fact that it’s taken up a rather large share of my time since then, I’ve been fairly “mum” about it on the site.  I’m not exactly sure why I havent written much about it, other than the fact that as of right now, my training is simply working out every day.  Mostly, I didnt want this to turn into a death race blog, because there are tons of those out there already (I read them on friday nights – for real).  However, I’ve lately been feeling like the workouts that I do are not going to be enough, and it’s starting to bother me.

This race is meant to be a physical, mental challenge and mindfuck.  They publicly tout the fact that only about 15% of the entrants finish the race each year.  When I signed up for the race, I pretty much knew where I’d stand – in the 85% that would get their race packet stamped with DNF (Did Not Finish).  I’m dont think I’m some sort of workout god or anything like that, nor do I think that I’m some sort of superhuman, so I simply trained for 5 months, resigned to the fact that even though I was training, I wasnt going to finish.  The worst part about that is that there was most likely nothing that I would be able to do about it either.

Unfortunately, this developed a poisonous attitude within me during my training.  All of the sudden I began to make excuses about skipping certain exercises while at the gym, in the interest of “time”.  I told myself that I’d do the sit ups and push ups at home, so that I could get out of the gym on time and get to work.  I mean, what difference did it make anyway?  It’s a virtual certainty that I wasnt going to finish the race, so skipping out on a few sit ups wasnt really going to matter in the long run, right?  That logic has been very pervasive, as well as very damaging to my training.  With the results pre-ordained, it gets difficult on a down day to even bother trying.  As I’ve been noticing, this is very common with large, seemingly insurmountable tasks.

This race isnt about finishing or about getting to the top and checking something off of a bucket list.  This is about life.  How you handle adversity, what you do when you’re unsure of things, and breaking limits that you never thought existed or have never bothered to test.  Knowing that I’ll come out of this with something that I cant get anywhere else is assuring, but isnt going to change my attitude now.  Lately, I’ve been pushing myself even more as the race is getting closer, and I’m still having trouble breaking out of the attitude.  Somedays it goes well, and others not so, but still I keep going.  After a while, it hit me – this is just like getting out of debt.

At the beginning, I was very gung ho, and was able to pay off all of my credit card debts and one of my student loans.  From there though, the initial excitement and “can-do” attitude waned, and I fell into a few year long slup with my debt repayment.  I never added new consumer debt  (not counting mortgage) but I didnt make significant progress on the debt that I had already.  After a long spell of not doing much, I slowly started to focus on student loan number two, and was able to get a few wins and feel successful after that.  Once that happened, I decided to make one last push and get it paid off once and for all.

That taste of victory continued, and after a quick slowdown because of cash flowing our wedding expenses, H and I got back on the wagon and started hammering down the truck, which I paid off at the beginning of the month.  This win has ignited both H and I, and we will begin to attack the student loan with the vigor that we attacked the truck, and that I attacked the credit cards with back in 2009 and 2010.

With the race, I’ve been conditioned to fail.  I dont know what’s going to happen during or after – all I know is what’s happening before the race, and I dont mind it so much at all.  It’s easier to stick with what I know than push myself outside my boundaries, which could be fraught with risk, uncertainty and potential failure.  Who wants to experience that, right? No one likes to fail.

The same thing happened with my debt repayment.  Everyone told me at the beginning that debt was just something you lived with and tried to manage.  You couldnt be totally free of debt, you just had to watch the amount that you had and try and keep a lid on it.  You needed debt to buy a house (not totally true, but it helps), you need debt to buy a car (not true) to live your day-to-day life (not true).  I’d been conditioned to accept debt, but to try and keep it at a manageable level.  My dad even told me this when I told him that I was trying to pay off all my debt.  On the side of well managed debt, I was conditioned to find it acceptable, because changing that would take a lot of hard work, and uncertainty and sacrifice during the debt payoff period, and fear about what was going to come after.  Then again, I’d made my wishes of being debt free so public, I’d have to come back and explain to everyone that I failed, and they were right and living debt free was not possible.

While I dont know the outcome of the death race just yet (but I can guess) – it’s nothing more than that at this moment – a guess.  I can absolutely go there and tear it up, or I can break my ankle getting off the plane in vermont and not even start.  But there’s one thing that I do know: No one can stop me from trying but myself.

The same goes for you and your debt.  You may be facing a mountain of debt yourself, living paycheck to paycheck and feeling comfortable about your situation.  If you are, and you feel like debt is something that you can never completely eradicate, then go ahead and keep doing what you’re doing – that’s more than fine.  However, if you’re willing to sacrifice and work hard the common logic of debt needing to be managed does not apply to you.  You can be one of the many that is afraid to try, content with the way things are going for you or you can be one of the few that is curious about what’s on the other side of debt, and do anything in your power to get there.  No one but you can stop you from trying to pay off your debt.  You also dont need anyone’s permission to pay off your debt, you just need  a plan and some spare cash to start.

You most likely cant pay off all of your debt in 1 day, 1 month or even 1 year – it took you a lot longer to build it up than that.  Get ready for a long, hard slog and a lot of sacrifice.  But I promise you, it will be worth it in the end.  I am not even finished with my debt repayment yet, but I’m close enough now that I can taste it.  I didnt make much progress for the better part of 2 years, but I didnt stop trying and my balances kept going down.  When I started, I had 55,000+ in consumer debt, and I made about 32,000 per year.  Things have changed since then, and now I’ve got just $8,800 in non mortgage debt left to pay off.  Despite what everyone says about debt, I’m closer to being debt free (without the mortgage) than I have been since I was probably 19 years old, and it feels swell.

Remember, the things that always make you feel the best (and the best about yourself) require an effort that you’ve never put forth before that point.  I had never made more than $6,600 in 1 year when I started trying to pay off my debt.  I didnt let it stop me and right now, I’m almost out of the woods.  Use the hardest thing that you’ve ever done in your life for motivation, but know this will be more challenging – just not in the same way.  Grab on to the chair you’re sitting in and it’ll be a rough ride, but you’ll get through it, and you’ll be so happy with yourself on the other side.  You’ll also be ready to take on a task that you never would have dreamed of starting before you paid off your debt.  What will it be?

The death race may get the best of me, but it wont be for lack of me trying.

Readers: Have you been talking yourself out of debt repayment for one reason or another?  If not – congrats, if so, how can you get yourself back on track?  How do you treat the naysayers in your life, and how do you deal with yourself when you join them?